Cloud by Aaratreeka Das

Homeless, jobless, starving , aimless
Like the cover of ethereal darkness
Lying on the pavement, home to me
Wishing for the world to welcome me
Unfortunate you say? Well that is true indeed
To stare at the sky as the light filters through
The dusty rays scrubbing away at my skin
Whether in the chill or in warmth
Aimless, drifting like a lone cloud , ignorant
Not a roof above me, nought a place to return to
Free you say? That is a dream that can’t be true
For wandering around, waiting in vain
Is like a bird in the wild with a broken wing
Am I free you ask? Well freedom comes with prices
In the morning , draped in dew , awakens my sun
The hustle and bustle of the living world
The whirr of the speeding wheels
The idle chatter , the dishes that clatter
And the melody of an old woman’s gossip
The mornings are idle , bright and free
The grasses shiver underneath me
The daises pop and lavenders laugh
Huffing their own melody
There is talk of the girl that abandoned her parents
There is talk of the girl who has yet to leave her parents
There is talk of the town , soulful in joy

The afternoons are painful, like the sun
As it crumbles down on my skin
Burning like flames
Aflame in my nylon threads
There is the whiff of roasting poultry
The air is wretched with the pungent smell
There is the sound of hearty laughter
As men munch down on their bread
I smell them not , nor do I hear
For what awaits this greed , is a life full of fear
I go about my day , wandering in vain
The odor distracting , but not yet tempting
Is a devilry that the dusk will face

As the dying sun , brings forth a dusk anew
The scent of vehement coffee lies heavily on my tongue
Expresso, no americano that’s what they call them
A cup dull of a thick, hollow like liquid
Denser than the deepest ocean
More bitter than the taste of defeat
Atop it sits , like shells on the shore
A swirling dome of cream
The white so pure , like a daisy in the bloom
Or like the moon, unblemished
That is when I search
Past determination forgotten
Of what they call food , a taste of this divine being
Is all that I have ever needed
I worship my shrine , my god , my religion
Translucent and clear , where my meal awaits
I feast again on what you had once thrown away
The bread so soft , softer than yesterday
It fibres pressing down against my crevices
The sweet tangy marrow tickling at my uvula
I fail to notice the mushy greens
Or the rotten tangy taste
For the luxury of awaiting a proper meal has
Once again been forfeited
And finally the cold liquid, that which you call water
Tingling down my throat
Pressing down on my wind pipe like cold fingers at the ready

The nights are beautiful, unlike them all
The unblemished moon shining above
The rain as it beats down on my skin , rippling through the night
The whirling sounds , synchronising like music
Their voices slightly muffled like the choruses of old
I see no more than I should
Only people with flowering hats
Fluttering lips and smoking eyes
I dance to this beat , forgetting my pain
Barefoot , my soles pulsing in agony
Yet I dance , for this night is a rollercoaster
That does not stop
I keep on dancing, surging in and out like beats
Grinning faces , a vision throbbing in my head
Switching on and off, just like fairy lights on Christmas
They slip something into my hands
Sandy shores , glimmering in the sun
Shining like gems
It smells like strawberries , oh sweet strawberries
Tangy and saccharine
Like the tempting apple of knowledge
It has bound me to what I hadn’t desired
I keep on dancing, and I keep on dancing

Now tell me is this the outcome of freedom
Is this the freedom you desire
To live in the open , not a soul to return to
Under the merciless stars
To lend ears to another’s joy to another’s success
To be an audience to a happy family and a home
Where you belong , that which you cannot escape
A home , are you ready to forfeit it all
To escape this home, to keep running till it ceases to exist
Only to look back and realise that it isn’t what you had wished?
To wake up to the awakening to the sun, to remain nonchalant
Unaware of the world , to feast upon measly left overs
To treat every scent and cent as a priceless treasure
To dance yourself to oblivion, to avoid feeling their graze
Opening your eyes to every morning , with a new pain
A new mark , a senseless throbbing in your bane
To feel the lingering taste of the forbidden fruit once again
As it binds you to your fate , desperate for more
Oblivious to all pain
This my friend , is the freedom I sought out
Trust my word this isn’t woth it without a doubt
There is a world of diamonds, glitter and love
But it isn’t here , this world is a world of freedom and pain
A freedom whose existence , whose mere knowledge
Scares you into binding yourself to these shackles,
Of Fame

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